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In her latest chronicle of her aunt’s agony, bestselling author Jane Green shares advice with a woman mortified by her roommate’s noisy bedroom antics.
Do you have a question for Jane? Email dearjane@mailonline.com or drop it below
READ MORE: My Son’s Teacher Complains He’s a BULLY
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Dear Jane,
I’ve lived with the same roommate for three years without a problem – we’re not best friends, but we’re great roommates. We don’t fight, we’re both neat and tidy, and we occasionally share pizza when we both feel like being lazy.
Two months ago she started dating this new guy and everything is going well for them. How can I know? Because I can hear literally everything they say and do through the paper-thin walls of his room.
And by everything, I mean their incredibly energetic sex life.
Now, I’m not the type of girl who wants to throw water on anyone’s fire, but this is actually becoming unbearable. They’re there all the time. During the day, in the wee hours of the morning… it goes on and on.
Dear Jane, My roommate keeps having incredibly loud sex with her boyfriend – and she refuses to acknowledge that our neighbors have started complaining.
And the noises are crazy. There are screams, blows… I’ll spare you the other details but it became so loud and incessant that even the neighbors started to complain.
A guy who lives in the apartment next door approached me in the hall to ask if we could please keep the noisy “antics” to a minimum, and the couple who live on the other side of us swiped a note under our door asking us to do so. please stop with these sexual cries.
Both times my roommate just laughed and said they had to live or grow up.
International bestselling author Jane Green offers insightful advice on DailyMail.com readers’ most burning questions in her column “Jane’s Dear Agony Aunt.”
I really don’t want to sound like a prude, but this is making my life a little miserable right now and I have no idea how to tell him.
She’s obviously not bothered, but I’m so mortified by what people think that I won’t even take the elevator in case people come up to me to talk about it.
Please help me !
From,
Silent cry for help
Dear silent cry for help,
Good God.
Maybe it’s my age, but I’m exhausted just reading this letter – your poor neighbors, and poor you! Yelling and hitting are no fun for anyone.
Well… Maybe for a few people, but no one else!
As for your neighbors and not getting in the elevator, it’s not your fault, and you are not responsible for your roommate’s behavior.
If they complain to you, tell them it’s even worse living in the apartment with them.
Something has to change. Try to record how loud they are and listen to it so she has a good understanding of what it’s like to try to sleep through that noise.
Failing that, I might be inclined to wait until your roommate takes a night off with her boyfriend, preferably when she’s trying to catch up on sleep, and bang a few pots and pans in your room, while singing very strong on your favorite. Songs.
Let out a shout or two. Maybe jump on the bed a few times, making sure the headboard bangs against your shared wall in a somewhat… rhythmic…
Hopefully one of the above will help him understand how selfish his behavior is.
If she still doesn’t understand, I suggest it’s time for you to start looking for a new roommate.
An Open Letter to Jane: Addressing the Ongoing Issue of Disturbance Caused by Loud Intimate Moments