For people with social anxiety, it can often be overwhelming — but a psychologist has revealed how to deal with the struggle.
Dr Carmen Harra, American author of Committed: Finding Love and Loyalty through the Seven Archetypes, for example says that there are ways to combat the feeling of isolation when you have the condition.
She told FEMAIL that the tips include saying no to events you’re not comfortable with to do acts of kindness on a regular basis.
Dr. Carmen added: lost feelings are signals from your inner self that something is wrong on a deeper level and that certain aspects of your life need to change.
Here Dr. Carmen five actions you can take today to break out of isolation and reunite with a support group…
For people with social anxiety, it can often be overwhelming – but a psychologist has revealed how to deal with the struggle (stock photo)
DO NOT JOIN EVENTS JUST TO PERMIT OTHERS
Dr Carmen said: ‘Go only where you feel comfortable. Be selective in the invitations you accept and only attend events where you know your attendance is appreciated.
“Take a moment to think about where you feel most comfortable and before you leave your house, check not only that you have your keys and wallet, but also how you feel: are you up for this meeting and do you want to really go (not just to please others)?
“If you find that the answers are no, remember that it’s okay to decline the invitation; forcing yourself to socialize will only exacerbate the desolation.
“Your mental and emotional well-being is more important than a temporary distraction.”
AVOID SURROUNDING YOURSELF WITH NEGATIVE PEOPLE
“Surround yourself with really good people,” the psychologist insisted. The problem isn’t always being alone, it’s feeling alone because you’re with the wrong people.
“If a particular person — be it a partner, friend, or family member — makes you feel uncomfortable, insecure, or undervalued, rethink your relationship with him or her.
“Maybe it’s time to create some space between you two and find someone who’s as genuine and kind-hearted as you are.
“Some red flags to watch out for aren’t the same effort you put into the relationship and invalidate your emotions as you try to explain how you’re feeling.
‘Let go of the mentality of loneliness and the fear that you will be hurt or disappointed; there are plenty of people out there who have pure intentions and can make you feel whole, whole and loved.
“Otherwise, staying in bad company makes you feel more alone than when you’re alone.”
PERFORM KIND OPERATIONS
Dr Carmen said people need to create a positive ripple in the world to avoid feeling lonely.
She explained, “Don’t hesitate to seize an opportunity to do good.
“Doing good will unite you with a community and make you thrive by collaborating with others for a greater cause.
“Performing acts of kindness increases the feel-good hormones in your brain and creates a sense of reward that reminds you how much power you have to positively impact this world.
It connects you more deeply with others and reinforces the common thread that runs through all of humanity: we are all here to love and be loved.
“One small act, performed with compassion and with no expectation of getting anything in return, can change someone’s life forever and eradicate loneliness from your heart and mind.”
TAKE IT EASY
“We can feel pressured to go out and have fun, even if we don’t feel like it,” the psychologist said.
“If this thought intimidates you, limit your time with others and increase your interactions little by little. For example, if you’ve been invited to a meeting but aren’t thrilled about it, plan to attend for an hour and apologize to yourself.
“For the next event, you can stay a little longer, and so on. Examine how you feel afterwards: Has being around you helped you feel less alone?
“Gently increasing interactions will curb feelings of loneliness and slowly reintegrate you into a strong and vibrant social circle.”