Photo Illustration by Elizabeth Brockway/The Daily Beast/Getty
Imagine you’re getting married. You’ve worked with a bunch of commercial vendors to plan the perfect ceremony: florist, baker, photographer, one of those wedding website companies, and of course the custom dressmaker and tailor.
The big day finally arrives, the vendors are on site, but just as guests start arriving something odd happens. The florist looks over the wedding program and comes over to you, saying, “You cannot use this officiant. His religious beliefs are heretical. You need to find someone else.” Then the photographer approaches you and explains, “It looks like you plan to have men and women mixed together in the wedding party. That is not appropriate. You have to change it.”
The website designer is next, grabbing your arm and saying, “I just read the vows you plan to exchange and there are sentiments I object to. Here is a list of edits you need to make.” The dressmaker, tailor, and baker are all waiting their turn. When you ask the vendors whether they have lost their minds, they look at you with solemn expressions and respond, “You may think this is your ceremony, but you are using our flowers, our photographic services, our website design, our custom clothes. That means this wedding is promoting our message. We are the speakers here.”